have Your way

2009-04-26T23:48:00.000+08:00

2009-03-19T20:20:00.003+08:00

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
Theres always one reason
To feel not good enough
And its hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

So tired of the straight line
And everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your back
And the storm keeps on twisting
You keep on building the lie
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference
Escaping one last time
It's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh
This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there
You're in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort here

ahh. i like this song...

2009-03-16T21:40:00.004+08:00

haha. i ate my fifth panadol of the day. hopefully i'm not overdose lol.
am on reserve for tomorrow's guard duty! damn. i really don't like guard.
@#$%^&*()

needa change blogskin soon, kinda bored. and i need new songs in my mp3
player!!! have been listening to lifehouse........ and lifehouse for months!
(though they're awesome but still.. i need some freshness!)

2009-03-15T19:03:00.002+08:00

I'm finding my way back to sanity, again
Though I don't really know what
I am gonna do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back in the arms of grace

I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be

I am looking past the shadows
Of my mind into the truth and
I'm trying to identify
The voices in my head
God, which one's you?
Let me feel one more time
What it feels like to feel
And break these calluses off me
One more time

'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside your door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be

I don't want a thing from you
Bet you're tired of me waiting
For the scraps to fall
Off your table to the ground
I just want to be here now

-

2009-03-15T00:48:00.003+08:00

curtain call was definitely a blast. kudos to jiali and her team!
what a waste that i've got guard until this morning.. my friends were also
doing guard... oh well.

sharon's over the top for liverpool's win..
man utd played so so badly..
@#$%^&*()

off to bed... very very sleepy now.

2009-03-11T23:01:00.003+08:00

my friend's nikon camera makes me wanna buy a Canon MARK DIII.
i've calculated.. i will have around $13k from all the salary after i ORD.....
provided i don't spend muchhhhhhhh. but if i spend it all on camera and the lens..
i'll have no money left for my studies!!!!!! argh. but then again, i might
be able to earn some bucks if i have a damn good camera.. which in turn
help me to go for what i want to study with sufficient amount of money..
still long way to go though..

2009-03-10T22:42:00.002+08:00

hoho. am in the office now. doing video editing..
somehow it's quite fun.. staying in.. doing work though i'm little sick.
but home's electricity is down.. hoho. sleeping soon! CIAOZ.

2009-03-09T21:08:00.006+08:00

went for medical appointment today, will be having another one on april 1st
and june. ate lunch at nus with weewee, met gideon for a while.. then left
for home.

anw i need a DSLR.. though most prob i would get one after ORDing..
need to capture more.. moments of my life.. i need them.
and my earphone just died.. the earphone that God blessed me after
i prayed last year. guess it's time to get a new one.. any recommendation?

hmm. i think the world's going crazy. sin has overtaken the throne..
revealing the consequences.. and stamping itself in people's lives.
i guess prince of the world is celebrating seeing many people fall by
their own sin..

John 6:32-33
32Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given
you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread
from heaven. 33For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and
gives life to the world."

i bet people at that time hailed Moses, respected him and followed him all the
way because God has used him.. but sometimes we get a little too carried
away.. we forgotten that it was actually God himself who provides not man.
it's like we've served the church's vision for God than God's vision for
the church. well this is at least for me... yeah. food for my thought.

oh eh. happy that the grads are happy with their results haha.

-

2009-03-09T00:53:00.001+08:00

i can't sleep!! argh.

2009-03-04T23:23:00.003+08:00

somehow.. human in general can be amazingly... beautiful
and noxious at the same time

.. which is a very scary thing.
to see our sins taking over us.
than the joy of life... overflowing out of us.

even sometimes when we tend to put our points across something,
we don't realise that it happens to us in certain ways at certain parts
of our lives too..

how contradicting.

2009-03-03T00:29:00.003+08:00

hmm. my eyesight's getting worse.. everything that is 20cm or more away is blur
especially at night. my heart and chest ache.. is still bothering me.. even
after 3months or so? i'm getting more and more sleepy each day.. i won't be
surprise if i die in my sleep or smth.. ha.

2009-03-02T02:06:00.004+08:00

guess i'm not ready to give up.

and on e sidenote, e girls on fb getting really... irritating.
i don't even know them at all.. WTH.

2009-02-26T19:37:00.001+08:00

the air has never felt so warm
the sky has never looked this way before
there's nothing comforting in change
I can't seem to find any peace in this confusion

I can't help my mind from racing
and my heart is beating faster than ever before
tell me is this really happening
I cannot tell if I am dreaming

2009-02-23T22:46:00.002+08:00

it's a hollow carousel eh.

i'm damn sleepy!

2009-02-17T20:21:00.001+08:00

i hate guard duty!

2009-02-16T22:17:00.004+08:00

“[Love one another] This is the message you heard from the beginning:
We should love one another.”
- 1 John 3:11

The greatest thing of all in life.. is love.
i need to love more..

He answered me, "The sin of the house of Israel and Judah
is exceedingly great; the land is full of bloodshed and
the city is full of injustice. They say, 'The LORD has
forsaken the land; the LORD does not see.'
-Ezekiel 9:9

18 "They will return to it and remove all its vile images
and detestable idols. 19 I will give them an undivided heart
and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their
heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. 20 Then they
will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They
will be my people, and I will be their God. 21 But as for
those whose hearts are devoted to their vile images and
detestable idols, I will bring down on their own heads what
they have done, declares the Sovereign LORD."
-Ezekiel 11:18-21

The Lord is not easily angered.. but yet God still have
to show His wrath... for discipline.. have our hearts
become like the sinful Israel?? Have we worship things
of the world more than the Lord??

as much as i want to improve in my design knowledge,
technical skills and style.... i need to focus on
growing my character.. my walk with God.. for that
will bring me far to the end of the race...

remind me Lord on Your ways..
bring me back to Your courts...
replace my heart of stone to a heart of flesh..

2009-02-15T22:39:00.005+08:00

something to rejoice about.
i've got into a 8-5 vocation.. and it's for the rest of my army life.
and i'll be doing photography and multimedia!
God knows my need!

did some designs today..
wondering how can i market my works... hmm.

oh, i bought an adidas bag for 41bucks.
it was 59bucks. didn't know theres discount.

hmm. i need a watch and... a DSLR.

2009-02-14T01:53:00.000+08:00

Adamant.

2009-02-08T20:48:00.002+08:00

Over The Rhine will be my next favourite band. :)

i need a watch, a bag, a pair of shoes. hmm.

and i have to book in.. soon. damn.

2009-02-01T18:53:00.001+08:00

LIFEHOUSE - STORM

How long have I been in this storm?
So overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form
Water's getting harder to tread
With these waves crashing over my head

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If I'd see you
This darkness would turn to light

And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know everything will be alright
I know everything is alright

I know you didn't bring me out here to drown
So why am I ten feet under and upside down
Barely surviving has become my purpose
Cause I'm so used to living underneath the surface

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If i'd see you
This darkness would turn to light

And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
And everything will be alright

And I will walk on water
You will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know everything will be alright
I know everthing is alright

Everything is alright
Everything is alright

2009-01-27T11:49:00.004+08:00

it's like a superficial superstition.
a blindfold for the naked truth.
a route to comfort, a guide to falsehood.

2009-01-23T22:26:00.004+08:00

had a wonderful wonderful week with God in camp.
i'm just so so so glad for this bro-in-Christ in my bunk..
he has brought my relationship with God to another level though
he might not know that.. gotta write him a card to thank him haha.
many incidents, God has been showing His faithfulness and love to just
both of us... damn cool.

anw outfield was memorable! for the first time in my life, i saw so many stars
in an open field... the wind was blowing towards me.. the sky was clear..
the stars were so bright... the whole experience was amazing and kind of surreal. according to my friend... there were three stars on the sky that belongs to the Orion belt.. you can see them lining up in.. almost a straight line.. cool..
God's faithfulness shown in such a tangible way eh.

what are homes when they are without existence?
tell me, what is?

2009-01-18T20:07:00.002+08:00

Jeremiah 17
5 This is what the LORD says:
"Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
who depends on flesh for his strength
and whose heart turns away from the LORD.

7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.

8 He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit."

9 The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?

10 "I the LORD search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward a man according to his conduct,
according to what his deeds deserve."

it's so weirdly and interestingly true.. isn't it.
even the most righteous man on this earth has a heart that's undecipherable.

God has been speaking to me these days about His truth..
which clearly set Him apart from all the philosophies of this world..
His truth.. is the answer to man's existence.. it sets us free not just by a little
but as a whole.. whereas, the things of the world... will devour us little by little.. away from the truth..

few more weeks and i'll pass out again.. the people i met in this current
camp has been wonderful..

what can i say but give thanks because the Lord has given to me
His faithfulness.. and love.

2009-01-11T18:21:00.002+08:00

emptiness within... my heart's waiting.
for a call that wakes my soul.

“In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free. The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?”
- Psalm 118:5-6

2009-01-09T20:28:00.002+08:00

what a week? it was a long wait.. yet it's kinda fast.
yesterday was funny though. my next long break would be cny.
can't wait to end this... oh well.

my room's infested with ants ever since i left for ns.
thanks to my sisters, they left every bit of their stuff
in my room.

help me... to love You more.

2009-01-01T08:09:00.007+08:00

08's gone and 09's here.
i guess 08 for me wasn't the best.
i was rather confused or clueless?
i was busy with my FYP... which led me way totally off-course.
even as i looked back to my own private journal.. my emotions at that point
were full of bitterness and my spiritual heart was struggling to live..

during the reflection at minops thanksgiving, i just couldn't rate myself
more than 1. i don't think i did enough to stay and grow close to God...
but God was and is patient with me... very patient indeed. and just recently..
like 3months back? i realised the... importance of friendship esp with those wonderful buddies i've known for more than 4-5 years... eg. ian, wal, peter,
daniel, yihui. it's hard to find friends with such a long 'lifespan'. i'll be
proud to tell people that i've known them for that long..

[Friday, May 16, 2008
i don't want to sleep.
i don't want to sin.
i don't want to walk away.
when i know i need You most.

O Lord, bring me back...
my soul...]

bring me back, bring me back... has been my cry for 08..

for 09? i want to be close to God... a friend of God.

2008-12-31T00:58:00.002+08:00

hoho spent 228bucks on design books. only regretted buying one of it.
the condition of it.. is like.. 50%? and the designs in the book were
only good at the last few pages :( o well. steven departed the Red Sea
once again with his talents.. i like the song! time to sleep!!!

hmm.. empty empty... *sigh*

2008-12-25T21:14:00.000+08:00

As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

You alone are my strength my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart's desire
And I long to worship Thee

You're my friend
And You are my brother
Even though You are a King
I love You more than any other
So much more than anything

I want You more than gold
Or silver
Only You can satisfy
You alone are the real joygiver
And the apple of my eye

-

2008-12-25T18:04:00.001+08:00

i'm gettin' ol'........................
can't we just stay youngggggggggggggg?
can't we just tell Time, 'Chillllllll la broo.'

and anw i got to book in.....

KILL MEZZXZCASODIJ!

*i just finished the book, Eragon. it's so nice!!

2008-12-20T23:15:00.004+08:00

right. been posted to artillery as gunnery at khatib camp.
o well. i was quite sian of it.. but it's not that bad i guess.
anw i'm too sleepy to think of anything.. but still i'm putting
my trust in God for my life.. yes.. He will make our paths straight
as we trust in Him.

come to think of it. i'm getting old. 21.. next year will be 22.
soon i'll have responsibilities of a working adult.. blah blah.
it's scary eh. o well. somehow my heart aches a little now and then.. hmm.

let my heart beat for You.
let my desire never fade.
You know that i know You are the Answer to my life.
All i ask is to be closer to You.

2008-12-16T22:19:00.002+08:00

i want to be like Moses, whom God regards him like a friend.

draw me close, i pray.

2008-12-08T09:16:00.004+08:00

down with food poisoning, thanks to the prata shop near cuppage.
i swear in whoever's name, i'll never EVER go to any prata shop in my lifetime...
i have to book in later.. and prepare myself.. for 24km march and pop. damn.
thanks to whoever that cooked that poison..

2008-12-01T17:46:00.002+08:00

let me fall in the comfort of Your arms every single night...
remind me of Your abundant grace that renews every morning..
let my heart grow close to know You more... every single moment.

2008-10-19T18:53:00.001+08:00

hmm field camp next week....... o.O

2008-10-12T16:51:00.002+08:00

Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.
- Proverbs 19:20-21

You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
-James 4:4

-

2008-10-12T01:55:00.002+08:00

great. finally i'm gonna blog smth, not gonna be long though i think.
i bought a super nice black sketchbook from huili haha. gonna
bring it to camp to draw! so far it's been okay, not too bad
and not that good at times. just returned $450 to aloysius for the HK
trip, a huge hole in my atm :( haha.

and... i shall blog more when i wake up. lol. tired.

2008-10-05T12:07:00.003+08:00

bought a $50 levis polo tee for my friend's 21st birthday.
then got a levis membership for another $50.
not sure whether i made e right choice but oh well.
i have discounts for levis, adidas, dockers, blah blah.
anyone who wants the discount just ask from me for the card.

oh eh i got 3 levis free gifts that's worth 90 smth bucks.
a organiser pouch which can be use for book protection..
which will come to great use when i get more books from puay.
a coin wallet and a pencil case. all in levis jeans material woo.

2008-09-28T17:54:00.001+08:00

"Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings."
- 1 Peter 5:8-9

2008-09-19T14:54:00.003+08:00

okay i'm out. i'm on one day MC...
got a little plastic thing went into my eye..
went to CGH for removal of that thing.
now am at ian's place before setting for the ferry
the training's damn tough... but o well...
somehow i guess God knows my limit..
gtg!

2008-09-11T01:30:00.003+08:00

Larkin Step

God he turned and walked away
I couldn't think of what to say
when plane engines fall through your roof
and I broke my knee while walking down the street that I live in
While no one was passing by

Life moves along and it trickles down the cheeks of every beautiful boy
Time comes along and it breaks every bone in your spine

Into the flight of night
Insomnia strikes and hopes alight
We set ourselves up to fall
So we stargaze and we write down all the things that we'll do
Fall into the river our pockets full of stones
Full of stones..

a brilliant song by Ling, who is a Singaporean. search on youtube
if you want to listen to it.

anw, i posted some photos of HK on my facebook... so.. view it there.

2008-09-01T02:25:00.003+08:00

humans are like shifting shadows.. they changes like the four seasons..
it's sad to see them change.. especially those you thought you
could trust?

anw, found a nice song by parachute band called Glorified.

Lord I come into your Holy place
stand in awe, of your cleansing grace.
who am i, that you would care for me?
I glorified the one who died for me.

Glorified, glorified
Let your name be lifted up and glorified
Let the earth tremble at your name
Let your name be lifted up and glorified

Into your hands, I commit my life
Day by day as a living sacrifice
Who am I that you would care for me?
I glorified the one who died for me

2008-08-30T23:42:00.004+08:00

all about You.
today's sermon was 11/10.

now.. i awaits for the day when i meet the Lord face to face..
to worship Him. i wonder how it's gonna be like.

2008-08-28T02:36:00.000+08:00

enigma.

2008-08-25T22:35:00.004+08:00

"truth" has been preached throughout the world everyday,
both indirectly and directly.

money is truth.. prosperity is truth..
pleasure is truth.. love is truth...
blahblah is truth.. it has come to a point where..
people are confused which to live for..

identity of oneself comes from the "truth" he/she believes in.
and sometimes, we've become victims of this world, thinking and
believing that money/physical things/goals/achievements are the pride
of life. we took pride in our physical condition, our career
status and sometimes even in our morals. everything that man
touches has turn gold to coal. tainted minds and hands.

Psalm119:9
9 How can a young man keep his way pure?
By living according to your word.

-

anw, i'm feeling old.. not because i just turned 21.. but
just that i feel old and i can see my 'oldness' visibly lol..
ran today.. but unsuccessfully.. kept stopping after one round.

a week left for HK, another weekend to NS...

2008-08-22T14:45:00.002+08:00

41750 Canadian Dollar(s) = 56221.8 Singapore Dollar(s)
this is the tuition fee for Digital Design in Vancouver Film School.
madness.. half of a 100k my god. i wonder how long will i be able
to save that amount to study... i doubt my dad has such amount..
i mean such amount for me to study.

2008-08-20T12:55:00.002+08:00

ran 2.4 yesterday.. then swam after that just for 15min -.-'
but anw. walked home e day before from serangoon north..
there wasn't any bus left.. spent the 30min with God. and
it was v fruitful i should say. come to think of it i only
have one more week.. before i leave for HK :( then NS.
so what i'll do.. is to catch up with ppl that i might not
be able to for the rest of the 2 years.. catch up with my
family also.. and lastly most importantly is to catch up
with God. haha.. plus i needa get a pair of specs...
NS stuffs, exerciseeeeeeeeeeeee. +++++++ freelanceweb
and plan for ministry.

2008-08-18T01:32:00.005+08:00

okay cool. i spent e whole day home. did e freelance web thing til
3pm? then i went to sleep woke up a hour later. steven, kaix and ben
came. then e rest of e girls came with huge amount of botak jones.
anw. they gave me a personalised pantone card which was brilliantly
done by eyou. power man! lol. yeah it's v nice.

so just wanna take this time to thank yiyou, jason, jerel, ian, kaixiang,
yao, small xinyi, yushan, ben, qianjin, huiying, huili, yongkang, pete,
shirls, eevoon, zijie, alvin, karchian, yeongdeng, anonymous,
datoumeinu(rachel?), jiali, carmen, jiayi, debbie, xiao gwen, steven,
puayguin, lays, aloy and all those who smsed me. appreciate them lots.
photos later. haha. (surprisingly, girls handwriting are kinda difficult
to read)

i guess my favourite verse for the pantone chart is acts 13:22c.
which was e last one, 'a man after my own heart(God's btw)'

that's my desire and my prayer..

2008-08-17T01:48:00.009+08:00

more on my facebook.

2008-08-16T02:29:00.003+08:00

hmmm.
convo's today. haha.

2008-08-13T11:31:00.003+08:00

woohoo. i'm going for convocation lol. thanks to my friend.
well he kinda scolded me for being stupid(according to my
interpretation) for not going because i got no guests going.
so i'll go missing this sat haha. sigh still got lots of things
to do. !@#$%^&*()

2008-08-12T04:30:00.003+08:00

man. wal reminded me that in ard 20 days, i'll be off for HK.
and after that will be two years of NS. i have not much time, in fact,
not enough to do what i'm have to do cos i've used my time on other
stuffs too much!!!!!!!

i have the freelance flash web to do, my friend's wedding book to do!!!
i need to think think think about my own ministry, a concrete plan
like what happens before and when i go NS. physically i'm still not fit!
i had diarrhoea today maybe cos of yesterday's prawns!!! or maybe it's
the chomp2 food!!!! i have yet buy any stuffs for NS!!!!!!!!!!! my younger
sis bday is on thursssssssssssssssssssss............ hmm.

i can't afford to flow along with fun any longer.. or rather i need
to start planning and preparing my heart for the next crucial month!!!!!!

feeling hungry and !@#$%^&*()

help me Lord to be still and You be my joy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AWHOCSHOHEHWFKJSNVCHSXDVIUHWHENEVERYTHINGSTARTSTOCRASHASDASDASDFVDVVXCBN

2008-08-08T02:48:00.000+08:00

maybe i did my best but i didn't try hard enough.
am i contradicting myself? haha. o well.

2008-08-07T04:38:00.004+08:00

somehow i think it's amusing how humans
can twist anything good to bad. things like
education, politics. sinful people made
use of things to their advantage. they
chased one another to achieve certain hierarchy.
money seem to be the root of all their pursue.
when the role of a politician is to help the nation,
it becomes a battle of pride, glory and maybe money.
when art supposedly is to influence in a good way,
it becomes just a tool for money. when love becomes hate
and money becomes king. what is this world pursuing?!
life on earth or life in the inner being?

2008-08-06T21:06:00.002+08:00

falling sick. zzz. eh. mum took 80$ from me. so i'm left with 205$ from
my savings. she has yet to return me 40$.. from two days allowance and
haircut. just blogging it down so that i'll not forget. need e money
for HK. don't think the freelance job is still on.

2008-08-04T00:26:00.003+08:00

hope kids was a great experience. i salute the spirit
of the people who were involved. we came together to
pray before they start. but before that, the leader was
sharing about 17 years ago, 5 people at the age of 24 started
e church. now, the avg age of a pastor is 40? then he was
mentioning what happens in 17 years from now. that's
when hopekids play a huge part in building biblical
leaders of the next generation? haha. but anw. i think
they are brave people who have to deny themselves and
make investments in the kids' lives which they might
not see the results now but only in the years to come.
haha. but anw, jontay's bro was the first to reach,
sat the most front and talked the most lol. o well.
i died after reaching home, slept from 3+ to 8+. o.O

anw, it's ben's 21st bday!

2008-08-02T01:55:00.007+08:00

okay. i went for a jog in the stadium on tues? then jog in the hot
afternoon somewhere just beside my place and gym on the next day.
used my house's 'running' machine today. so i've exercised entire
week. should be jogging on sunday again. wo0ot. gotta train.
my time is running out. but anyway. turning twenty one real soon..
it just feels surreal.. i could still remember the feeling of getting
up in the morning and walking to school.. i like that feeling btw.
but soon i'll have to work.. and be responsible like an adult???!?!
it's kinda indescribable. oh well. anyway, i did an unthinkable thing
(eh not really) i will be skipping my convocation lol. that means
i won't be receiving my diploma wahahha. just kidding, but i can still
get it from school. well it's on sat, i was intending to go but my
parents aren't going so no point being there anyway. o well.

ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. my wishlist for birthday?
hmm. i can only think of a few i think.. red/black manutd jersey, pair
of 5kg dumbbells lol, graphic/art design books?!, shit(nah), go0d c0mpany,
flipflops, what else? but anw, they are the things that i'll
buy it myself when i have the MONEY....... now i'm broke anw. way too
many birthdays in august. hope carnival's on my bday! think i'll give it
a miss, maybe haha. don't wanna spend e whole day there.

hopekids on sunday! my first! shall go find junhuang's brother and play
with him hahah.

2008-07-30T01:19:00.006+08:00

... only He understands how i feel. or rather how she's feeling.
i see no light in this fam.. unless He interferes.
zzzzzz.

Psalm 23
1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

2008-07-28T22:04:00.005+08:00

i got another nightmare which has made me so sleepy throughout
the day... i dreamt that we were having ESS and all the videos
were not working and we were editing them, trying to fix em
with the projector screen showing everything that we're doing.
and everyone stays in e auditorium til the end of the service
by just staring at the screen?! how weird. then comes the
part where i fought with zombies.. not those chinese kind..
but like resident evil you know. o.O

zzz. anyw, here's one of my favourite songs.
Into Your Presence
21212121212121212121212121212121...........21.

My heart longs for You, My soul thirsts for You,
Show me the place where I can go and meet You,
Underneath Your waterfalls, Deep will call to deep,
Rapids and breakers will wash over me,
I long for You in a dry and weary land.

Take me into Your presence, into your courts,
Lord I'm longing to worship, Face to face
I will bow at Your throne, I was made for this alone (x2)

Why so downcast oh my soul, put your hope in God
For I will yet praise You my God and Savior
At night Your song is with me, By day Your love surrounds me
I lift up a prayer to the God of my life,
I long for you in a dry and weary land.

-

2008-07-28T01:41:00.006+08:00

woo. i came back not long ago from prawning.
it's really cool. haha.

but anw. today's cg was interesting.
i like e part when shuz talked about the questions.
and here they are with my answers too!

1) memorable CG moments
there's this bro who had FITS during cg worship
which i was leading.. apparently another bro wanted
to carry on until he realised the severity of the
situation. lol.. purple face and lips.. foam coming
out of his mouth... o.O he's okay now btw. haha.

2) why do you stay in hope?
cos Hope has brought God's reality into my life
and has the most balance teachings, doctrines
from what i realised in my 7 years of stay..
there's so many churches in the world has
controversies about their teachings, blah blah..
it's really rare that.. you will find a church
that wants to do her best to obey the WOG FULLY.

another reason is cos of daniel. he has impacted
my life in every way.. his impact, consistency
that has brought God's truth into me. i mean
i don't stay for him but i stayed on because what
he has taught me, guided me and stuff. i'm so blessed
by such fatherly elder brother. :O

3) say smth about ur CG
we are very different. lol. and no, we don't want to
overthrow boss lol.

i wonder if i can still do much when i'm in e army.
kinda regretted not doing much for the two years
in minops. but o well i did my best for what i've
been asked to do......

2008-07-24T18:51:00.001+08:00

i had e worst nightmare ever in my life.. seriously.

2008-07-22T02:57:00.002+08:00

Healer
You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease
I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my Portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands

this is one of the most... Spirit-filled songs i ever heard.
Jesus the Healer, not just physical but emotionally, spiritually.

2008-07-21T21:29:00.003+08:00

there's this... heart that's burning... that desires to be favor
and chosen by the One who gives good gifts. to be set apart to do
something that no one can do... not for the sake of 'different'
from the rest but for dedicating this life.. specially and uniquely
set apart for His very purpose..

what can i live for except this?

just watched batman.. it's brilliant.. but somehow i couldn't
feel the fullness of the film.. maybe cos my mind was thinking
when can i go and pee!!!! o well........

today's a rainy day and a sleepy one too.

2008-07-20T02:19:00.004+08:00

realised a truth today while on my way to nexus.
we have like 50-60years more if we die peacefully...
some might have lesser.. or more. but e point is..
eternity is such a long time.. God is giving us
chances to get our lives right with him in these 60years?
and prove to Him that we are worthy, qualified to live
for eternity with Him. haha.

it's a great day today. missed e hosting part. wanted to
see the response.. o well. but i heard ppl liked it.
so thats gd. anw the drama's damn funny. very professional lol.
most importantly many ppl received Jesus! come to think of it
it was alr like 7 years since i made the decision... it make
sense to live... because of God.

met up with e dudes today with daniel. to be honest, i was
really blank in what to do for the meetup.. but in the end
i bet we had a great time catching up, joking around and
sharing our burden.. and stuff.. it's amazing to have people
you know serving for more than 5 years and they are the ones
you see them coming to know God.. that's so0o0o0o c0o0o0o0ol.
the joker jeremy now has four sheep... ZOMGGGG> lol. may the
Lord bring this group for greater glory in His own timing and ways...

took a pic with em but it's with daniel. shall show this pic then.

God looks at the heart... not the outward appearance... no matter
what L you are.. or just someone... it's the heart!!!!!! 心XING!!!
REMEMBER PPL!!!

(i feel that my entry is so messy today but o well)

2008-07-19T03:38:00.000+08:00

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz. randomness.

2008-07-17T15:09:00.000+08:00

i need to eat and sleep well, start exercising by running and more..........

2008-07-15T00:03:00.002+08:00

seriously, just look at the mirror will you.

2008-07-13T15:53:00.006+08:00

got a blessing to share...
went to my aunt's place to teach my uncle stuff.
kinda dread going there cos i was very tired.
but anw, it turned out to be a worthwhile trip.
managed to take a hour nap then talked to my two
aunts, grandma and uncle. then they kinda surrounded
me and asked me what i'm gonna do next time and stuff.

somehow i cherish every single second i spent because
my grandma though is healthy but she's getting old.
you never know what's gonna happen eh. my aunt is 47 this
year.. i tell you she looks like late 30s. lol. yeah.
i brought along e audio sermons that i downloaded and
transferred to my christian uncle's laptop, hopefully it will
help him in some ways. o yar. when i was taking a nap, i put on
my aunt's earphones cos mine was kinda spoilt then i just
asked God if i can have a new one..

guess what. my uncle gave me his new earphones when he
was looking for the usb cable to transfer christian songs
from my mp3 player to his laptop. i was stunned for a moment.
i know it's not just from him but from the Father above who
cares for His children. used it for two days and it's really
good! like you're in your own world when you plugged it in haha.

o yeah. then my aunt and grandma gave me $10 each... my uncle
thanked me and gave me $30.. haha. and mind you, i didn't go
there with a motive of getting money. but anyway, i'm left with
$10 from the $50. cos i used it for tithing.

somehow everything that happened that day reminds me of the verse
and Abraham sacrificing his son.
Matthew 7:9-11
9 Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone?
10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you,
then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your
children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts
to those who ask him!

my first instinct was to save the money for HK trip but i remembered
i need to tithe.. so it's like back to square one. but i'm assured that
God will provide for me. like how God gave Abraham a son and asked him
to sacrifice it.

2008-07-10T00:23:00.001+08:00

Marcos Witt - Thank You

Lord, You took me into Your arms
And You’ve shown me truest love
You have given me such mercy
I’m unworthy of

Lord, Your mercy everlasting
I could never understand
But for all the love
And grace You’ve shown
I just want to say

(chorus)
Thank You, thank You my Lord
Thank You from the bottom of my heart
Lord I thank You, thank You dear Lord
Thank You from the bottom of my heart

At the cross You gave Your life for me
As a gift of Your great love
It was the gift of everlasting life
From above
I can boldly come before Your throne
Through Your blood I’ve been set free
I’m going to shout it to the heavens
I’ve been redeemed!

2008-07-08T23:08:00.002+08:00

finally my room is clean! i spent 2hours throwing things away..
now it feels like new house?!
got a freelance job from lays.. will be doing with stevie.

2008-07-07T00:46:00.000+08:00

wal showed me this and i think it's damn cool!

2008-07-06T00:31:00.006+08:00

back from genting! it's not bad. at least it's something different
than life in sg. shan't blog about daily stuff. like day1 day2.
just gonna blog about.. highlights of the trip.
went for the theme park.. and played the craziest rides ever.
there was this free fall kind which is freaking high i swear.
according to my cousin, it's 18th storey? but i think it's higher?
this guy two seats away from me was counting down... and he was 3 sec
slow. @#$%^&*() i was preparing for e fall with his countdown..
but he gave me a false alarm.. !@#$%^&*()_+

then cousin and i both owned the corkscrew roller coaster ride..
we happened to be the last two. that ride was hella crazy too. anw,
some guy lost his wallet.. a bunch of boys picked it up and kept it.
they were just beside me. in the end when the guy came back looking for
the wallet, i managed to tell them who took the wallet with the help
of the camera that captures people's faces during the ride? how cool
eh? not sure if they got him. but somehow God spoke in this small
little incident, He will never let any injustice/sin go empty... not
just people's sins but even ours. you can never outsmart God eh.

my cousin's grandparents were holding hands when we were on the way
for lunch. which is amusing.. cos they're very old. haha.

and the fog at genting was so thick that i can't see things from 50m
away! but it was cool to see fog. just amusing!

i was on a first class coach.. how cool. the seat is a massage chair,
there's coach stewardess(?!?), playstation controller for games, two
meal was served during e 2way trip.
i watched 5 movies(ghost ah ghost-didn't finish it, it's not really
that funny/nice, 300-amazing movie, harrypotter-don't undersand most of the
show cos i forgot about e story, evanalmighty-it's a good biblical show!
and lastly 200pounds beauty-watched halfway though)

yeah. that's about it. oh and something from evan almighty.
"when you asked the Lord for patience, He doesn't give you patience
but the opportunity to be more patient."
which i think it's cool.

the way back to sg is cool too. everything on the road was without lights.
you can only see lights coming from the cars.

oh eh one last highlight, i went to a circus/magic show-Dreamz with
white tiger, white lion, dangerous stunts, magic and live band performing.
my cousin and his dad were called to perform together with e clown and
magic man.

surreal, surreal!

2008-07-03T00:49:00.003+08:00

now am at my grandma's place..
reminds me of my grandpa.. he passed away like two years back.
hmm. can't imagine that.. someone who is gone is like nonexistent..
as in.. you can never find him... somewhere.

nothing in this world worth living for.. except for what is eternal...
off to bed and genting...

when it all turns to dust............

2008-07-02T14:15:00.002+08:00

hm. soon i'll turn 21 then 30, 40 and so on... til the day i breathe no more.
rather than thinking i have all my lifetime to spare.. i've been living day
by day since years back? knowing that life is unpredictable and that makes me
being so pragmatic and boring sometimes?.. o well.

somehow it feels surreal that you own your life. everything you do is all
in your liberty.

heaven and earth will fade away.. but never will His word.
help me to cherish Your word and transform my heart every day of my life..

2008-06-29T23:40:00.000+08:00

all to blame.

...

2008-06-27T17:38:00.003+08:00

1 Corinthians 1:25
For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom,
and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

before we think we've outsmart God in the way we should
live our lives, think again. our prideful little puny
'smart' brain is compared as the foolishness of God.
even when we are supposedly right, we are still far from
being perfectly correct. so... never claim that we're
good enough to know what we're doing. but of course we
do have a brain that knows what we're doing. but just
that we shouldn't be too full of ourselves.

-

2008-06-27T02:16:00.004+08:00

my heart is grateful! because i know i'm not living
for a world waiting to suck the truth and notoriously
known for blinding people's hearts in the way we live
our lives.

the world's triumph and its misery.
break every callous part of me.

-

anw, i wont' stayover just for a mahjong session.
think it's a waste of time and what's more, it's
so detrimental to our health. lol. well, i didn't
say this because i lost the second half of the game..
but it's just.. a waste of time. o.O

monday's gonna be a fun day.
will be going gentings with my mum and relatives
next wed. going to LC september then two extra days
for touring around HK. then.. NS :D co0o0o0ol!

i need money for HK trip! so.. if you have any freelance
design job for me eg. Logo design, banner design, character
design, flash animation, namecard design, print design,
3d animation. please tell me!!

i would gladly accept them! contact me through phone/email!
thankssssssssssssss a million.

2008-06-22T00:24:00.002+08:00

just wanna say God is still working in my mind and my heart because
of OASIS camp wahah. i was on the train today when this verse just came
to my thought.

Romans 12:2
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be
transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to
test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will

our minds can actually different from the world because we are renewed
by the WOG.

2 Corinthians 14:16
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away,
yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.

i've still got alot of things to do even though i've got no school!
i got the jump logo animation, 1 wedding animation clip and finalising
a wedding photo montage clip. o.O

God, give me strength!

2008-06-20T01:32:00.001+08:00

break my heart for what breaks Yours.
help me Lord to see what's Yours.

2008-06-19T03:16:00.002+08:00

my god. this is funny and at the same time amusing. think i'll get
killed by them real soon. these are thousand years(5-6years) back!! there's
gwen in the screenshots... me on the bottom left omg.. jovin on e bottom
right.. in the middle, walmond was beating ian, lee and peter on the bg.
the rest are quite self explanatory.. wahhaah.

and i swear all these stuffs that we've been doing for years is
making an impact...

at least in my life, it is. haha.
so amusing!

2008-06-18T01:40:00.001+08:00

having flu, sorethroat and fever. few days back i've got headache!

2008-06-17T01:41:00.002+08:00

christians say the Word is truth....
how much time do we spend on it?

2008-06-16T13:29:00.001+08:00

I'm not content just to walk through my life, giving in
To the lies, Walking in compromises now
We cry out as a generation that was lost
But now is found in the power of the cross

-

2008-06-16T03:00:00.006+08:00

when ur heading e right way, there'll be opposition.
just on e day when camp ended, i was asked to do some wedding
clip and slideshow for my friend. and now i'm falling sick!

i'll make sure that i will rest well, finish my stuff and
keep applying what i've learnt during camp. i've drank gallons
of water..

some of the fav pics during camp

2008-06-13T14:25:00.002+08:00

Animation 3 - B
Audio Video Production 2 - A
Concept Development - B
Designing for Internet - B
Digital Media Design - A
Digital Motion Graphics - C
Drawing 3 - A
Independent Study in Computer Graphics - D
Professional Practice - D
Project Management - B
Research Methodologies - C

3 As, 4 Bs, 2Cs, 2 Ds,

and there goes everything right into waste!
2.51 for gpa is too low for uni studies or scholarship.

my first test of faith for post-camp eh.

2008-06-12T20:23:00.003+08:00

back from oasis camp! think it's the best camp so far.
God've spoken about so many things in my life. experientially,
it may not be as much as past camps, but in terms of application
points.. it outweighs everything.

here's my application points...
spirit of learning - christian lit & bible
dream - my career should be in line with the Great Commission

and somemore which i can't remember.. lazy to take out my notebook.
anyway. we had a crazy night at chalet playing 3Kings introduced by
Benwai. the game's very fun.. but crazy. boss did a lion dance and
it's so tempting upload it on youtube :D the wargames for camp
was cool too. haha. only qizhi and me were guarding the freaking maze.
lol. but we let them off with all the crosses and just kept scaring
people off instead of killing them hahaha. shall upload the photos
to facebook or smth.

now's camp over.. it's time to apply what we learn eh?

have Your way in me.

2008-06-08T01:55:00.005+08:00

.. i knocked e side of my head real hard while rushing to not miss
my bus stop. there's now like a bulge? and feeling a slight goggyness.
zzz.

hopefully i'll be able to go for hongkong LC.. but i need the money!! :/

camp's nearing and so are my days before my enlistment...
i doubt i can pass my napfa. o well.

2008-06-06T02:57:00.003+08:00

A Place Called Grace

So many years I heard it told
The story of compassion
A prodigal son who left the fold
And found no satisfaction
On my knees, Lord, I cried out to You
“I’m so alone
But if there’s room in Your house for one more
I’m ready to come back home?

I know there is a place
Where arms of compassion welcome me home
Sweet mercy falls like rain
I know there’s a place called grace

So many days I’ve trusted grace
Yet I have to wonder
How many times my human strength
Has kept me from surrender
The more I learn just to lean on the cross
The more I see
When I fall, I will fall to the place
Where mercy reaches me

If it seems that my courage is strong
There’s just one reason
He’s my rock when my faith is all gone
He holds me in His arms
Gives me strength to carry on

-

Psalm 139:13 - 14
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me
together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and
wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know
that full well.

i'm amazed by God's creation, especially at my own
physical and spiritual heart. how good and bad it
can turn out to be.

anw, reading too much inuyasha manga has devoured
my mind with images of it like every single sec...
argh. will stop reading it.

2008-06-01T00:02:00.004+08:00

these few weeks has been shit, like literally.
just very frustrated with what is going on.
there was nothing new under the sun.
and it just felt like chasing after the wind.

the book of ecclesiates talks about life's meaninglessness.

everything felt so meaningless. and to be honest,
there wasn't even a tinge of reason for me to go on.

maybe it's fatigue? maybe i've been going crazy for my fyp
til i forgot my vision in my life. i don't know.

i need to get my vision right before going for another
crazy period of life if not, i'll just fall away.

my grandpa's good friend has just passed away due to cancer.
not sure if i should pay a visit tomorrow.

and just wanna thank boss for being an understanding and
patient leader/boss.

2008-05-30T22:57:00.001+08:00

i'm still.. not so sure yet i guess.

gotta fix that puzzle.

2008-05-29T21:19:00.001+08:00

it's a bed-ridden poetry.
such bore.

2008-05-27T01:04:00.002+08:00

i've no respect for such lies.

2008-05-25T00:44:00.005+08:00

i would be lying if i said i don't need You in my life.

-

saw a hoodie at FCUK. think it's freaking nice.
shall buy it soon.

2008-05-24T04:56:00.000+08:00

i just don't know.

2008-05-23T02:01:00.001+08:00

save me.
from this broken shipwreck.

i'm such a irony eh?

2008-05-22T16:56:00.001+08:00

it's falling apart.
the living dead who doesn't care.

2008-05-20T23:32:00.002+08:00

there is no sense of trust.
and the world is lying in making it a better place.
how 'promising' covenants between humanity has become.
o well.....

ellen page is my new idol. her acting is freaking good.

2008-05-17T03:00:00.002+08:00

i've not seen any movie for almost a year? can't remember what's e
last movie i watched. maybe transformer? o well. i managed to catch
Stardust just now and i like it! very nice! the dead ghosts are damn
funny! though it's a like fairytale, such shows trigger emotions
which i think what separates my favourite movie and my not-so-favourite
movies. My Sassy Girl is another nice one. haha. and One Litre of Tears.

o well. gotta catch some sleep.......... long day ahead tomorrow.

2008-05-16T04:54:00.003+08:00

let me be a fool for You....
me a liar, You the truth.
...

2008-05-14T21:11:00.003+08:00

huili's 21st birthday!
it was nice and easy like what she said, haha.
think besides daniel, shes another leader whom i learn alot from.
very sacrificial and committed woman of God. i'm sure those who know
her is bless by her life.

2008-05-12T02:31:00.001+08:00

nice song.

Westlife - Us Against The World

Verse 1
You and I, we've been at it so long
I still got the strongest fire
You and I, we still know how to talk
know how to walk that wire

Sometimes I feel like the world is against me
The sound of your voice baby that's what saves me
When we're together I feel so invincible

Chorus
'Cause it's us against the world
You and me against them all
If you're listening to these words
Know that we are standing tall
I don't ever see the day that I won't catch you when you fall
'Cause it's us against the world tonight

Verse 2
There'll be days we'll be on different sides
But that doesn't last too long
We find ways to get it on track
We know how to turn back on

Sometimes I feel I can't keep it together
then you hold me close and you make it better
When I'm with you I can feel so unbreakable

Chorus

Bridge
We're not gonna break 'cause we both still believe
We know what we've got and we've got what we need alright
We're doing something right